Almost a year ago, I told you about the benefits of gratitude. I imagine that you know it, the scientific studies on the subject are numerous: gratitude allows a better resistance to stress, a greater life expectancy, and to be happier simply. But beyond scientific studies, personally, it is the daily practice of gratitude that has brought me the most serenity in my life.
To become a champion of all categories of happiness, I offer you many concrete and practical examples of gratitude, as well as different ways of implementing it in our daily lives. And you will see that the more you climb the ladder of gratitude, the more you will feel connected to others, and at peace with external events.
Sometimes we try to do lots of things to feel more happy: buy lots of things, fill our lives with dates, etc. We also complain about not having what would allow us to be happier. In short, we do not suspect that gratitude alone can bring us much more intense happiness.
Gratitude works on many levels. There is no end, no finish line, but only steps towards more joy and balance. And the good news: we have all our life to practice deepening each of these levels, to embody them with ever more intensity.
⚪ White Belt of Gratitude: A look back at the day
(Whatever stage you’re at, frankly it’s already great!)
At the end of the day, take a moment with a notebook and pen in hand, and write down all the big or small reasons to be happy about the day you just spent. It can be moments, achievements, but also general things in life, which you would miss dearly if tomorrow you were told that you no longer had them. The benefits of this habit are already immense on our felt happiness, our good mood and the reduction of our ruminations.
Examples of gratitude for one-off things : the kiff of having finally succeeded in finishing your administrative papers; this text message received from a friend (which shows that he is thinking of you); the pleasure (luck) of having had a coffee in the sun; etc.
Examples of gratitude on less specific aspects : the chance to have eyes to see; the chance to have a roof; the chance to be free; etc.
💛 Yellow belt of gratitude: looks on people
(with enormous benefits in our relationships)
At the end of the day, put your notebook and pen in your hand, and this time write downi have all the reasons to be happy to have such and such a person by your side (your children, your spouse).
Examples of gratitude : your child who hugs you when you arrive; your spouse who cooked a good dinner; your child who laughs like crazy at judo; your partner who managed the plumber; this bond between your children who were having fun tonight on the sofa; etc.
🧡 Orange belt of gratitude: feel deeply
For this new step, once you have landed at the end of the day, take the time to REALLY FEEL how lucky you are. So to go from a mental level (“My appointment was canceled and it gives me a little time”; “I loved that my child jumped on my neck when I arrived”) to a emotional level … For that, you can close your eyes, and take the time (accompanied by music, without words, it is often easier) to feel emotionally how life spoils us!
And you will see, this step changes everything!
It is also an exercise that we are used to doing with parents in nos coachings and which has a real impact. “As soon as I started to focus on the positive, the negative thought pattern and therefore theannoyance and the reproaches which I was showing were very quickly swept away ! And it feels great to enter a virtuous circle.. thank you ! »(Damien, father of a child of x years)
💚 Green Belt of Gratitude: Feel Live
Realizing how lucky you are afterwards (at the end of the day) is obviously a huge step. And the next step is to gradually achieve feel this gratitude at the same time of the day when we live this cool stuff, and realize in the moment how lucky we are to experience it. This is where gratitude becomes more than a habit, and turns into a state of mind. So of course, even though some of us naturally have an easier time than others, thanks to our temperament or our upbringing, “it doesn’t just happen”. It’s like learning to swim the front crawl: it’s accessible under one condition: training 🏊♀️. 😎
🟤 Brown Belt of Gratitude: Celebrating Our History
There comes a stage where we can come to feel gratitude for the complicated things we have experienced in the past. For me it comes down to become aware of how much Life loves us and spoils each of us, even in difficulty.
Examples of gratitude:
When people tell me their stories, I am always impressed. Because despite all the difficulties they have encountered, many great challenges have often turned out to be an opportunity in their lives.
- For example, my friend who has divorced, and who was at the bottom of the hole and could not take it any more… realized a few years later, that this separation had been a huge chance for her. Thanks to this, she was able to free herself, and feel more of herself. Today, she shines 100 times more than before. But when she was at the bottom of the hole, she was unaware of all the gifts that life had in store for her.
- Other people have told me that their dismissal was one of the hardest times of their lives. While realizing that it is also thanks to this that they finally made the decision to retrain. And this new activity, in the end, allows them to really feel shining.
- And then, of course, the burnout is a modern scourge difficult to overcome. And yet, this overflow is often an opportunity for people to make a fresh start to a new life. It allowed them to make decisions they might never have made, and which ultimately allowed them to make that turn that they didn’t dare to take.
Sometimes, we walk on a path that does not suit us and life will bring us its share of difficulties (a burnout, we will be fired, dumped, etc.), to guide us towards a path that will fulfill us more.
🖤 Black Belt of Gratitude: face hardships with gratitude
Finally, the “black” belt is to achieve express gratitude for complicated life events, as you go through them. It is to have the ubiquitous conviction that everything is pinned in our path to offer us the possibility of going towards a direction that allows us to shine more.
So we don’t have to believe it, maybe it’s wrong. Personally, I believe in this a lot (and I train myself to integrate it more and more) and this certainty makes a huge difference for me in my daily life. The most important benefit: this confidence in life, which allows to stay a lot more serene in the face of all the challenges that come our way. And this serenity in the future, or quite simply in life, brings a lot of inner peace.
It helps a lot, to be convinced that behind a difficulty, there is always something better that awaits us.
Examples of gratitude:
In my entrepreneurial life, where of course like any entrepreneur, I have not been spared in terms of difficulties, bad news, it is clearly what allowed me to cross these hazards with more serenity: “confident in the fact that behind these difficulties, life has plenty of good surprises in store for me ”. And each time my belief has been verified more or less quickly. So of course that helped reinforce that belief that I already had!
- A person who leaves the company – big bad news – and who turns out to be a few months after very good news;
- big partnerships which do not succeed in the end, and which, a few months later, made me realize that this would have been the worst thing that could have happened to me; etc.
In short, I cultivate a certainty that if the events have happened thus, it is that in the end, it is a good thing.
- If the apartment of our dreams finally passed us under our noses, it is perhaps because in the end, we will find even better … or maybe that “fortunately” we did not have it, because the neighbors engage in it every night; or that it would have put us in financial difficulty to have this too large loan on the back.
Of course, I am talking about events over which we have no control. I really like this quote from Marcus Aurelius who said:
« Give me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can change, and the wisdom to distinguish one from the other ».
If you want to develop the black belt of gratitude, here is a very simple tip:
take the time in the next few days, first to list the challenges of your life; the small, the big and the medium difficulties which happened to you… and then, list in front of all the positive repercussions that this could have had in your life. For starters, don’t take events that are too recent, because you may have more difficulty taking that step back.
Through this exercise, the more we take the bend of seeing what challenges bring us, the more we develop this confidence in life … And more when a new challenge arrives, we manage to say that it will come out of the positive. Even if we do not know what will be next.
And it is because gratitude is for me a real asset in life, that I want to pass it on to my children, and that I wanted to create “a gratitude book for 5-12 years” with the “ real good questions ”which will be able to open his eyes to the magic of Life.
If you too want to train your child to feel how life spoils them, and in the process you want to offer each other a little moment of complicity, you can order our brand new until November 28 gratitude book (5-12 years) to grow up happy. He is in limited edition, do not take long to order it.
> Click here to find out <<
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How to embrace gratitude? Concrete examples